Saturday, November 03, 2007

Back Off, Lowe's Paint Man!

I had a pregnancy "episode" today.

After working 4 hours (to earn comp time), I hit the mall. I desperately needed dress pants (since it has gotten cooler...and now that I know I'm having aboy, I suddenly feel like I am carrying lower and can't pull up my pants!)! Thank goodness for Target, where I happily bought new clothes, new flats (for future work fire drills), my new breast pump (Too much information???) and updated my registry with some BLUE stuff!

Last night, Caleb and I picked out the paint color for the nursery. So, on my way home from shopping, I stopped by Lowe's to get the paint.

I did not know that the paint man was an idiot who obviously had no idea what he was doing. Had I known this beforehand, I would have happily left the store and would have driven out of my way to a different store to avoid him.

I gave him my little color sample and he wrote "1 gallon" on the color I wanted. Smooth sailing so far! He said it would take about 15-20 minutes. Really? I looked around....there is no one else waiting. I told him I would wait! He took his grand ol' time getting the paint...his grand ol' time mixing it up...and then he placed it on the counter. I asked him if he would mind opening the paint and putting a little dot on the top so I could see what it would look like when it dried. He looked at me like I was the idiot. (Isn't this what they do? Past paint people have ALWAYS done this for me. Afterall, the purchase of mixed paint is final, so I would kind of like to know what I am getting before I pay for it. )

He put on some latex gloves and "slapped" them like he was about to insert his finger up someone's butt (Too much information???) He dipped his entire finger in the paint and smeared it all over the top of the can. (Great...that is going to get all over my car, I thought) I didn't even make a big deal about the wet paint....they have these nifty little blow dryers behind the counter for the very purpose of showing you ahead of time the color you are buying....I let it go! I didn't ask for the blow dryer.

I took my paint and went to get rollers and tape and to wait for it to dry a little. That's when I realized the idiot gave me the wrong color. Not good. The label said "Sea Meadow"....he wrote "1 gallon" over "Limeish". I wanted "Limeish"!

I walked back to the counter and "politely showed him HIS error". It took forever for him to finally understand what color I wanted. After he mixed up the new paint, he placed the can on the counter again. Yeah, right! Like I am going to just believe him that he got it right this time. I asked him if he could put a little dot on the top of the can ( before) so that I could see what I was buying. He opened the can and put a little dot on the lid and went to walk away. "Um, do you mind closing the lid for me?" I asked...then....THEN....THEN....THAT'S when he pushed my last button! He handed me the hammer to shut the paint can myself!!! THIS IS YOUR JOB! I DIDN'T EVEN ASK FOR THE BLOWDRYER TO BE USED...THE NERVE! hehe

I let him have it...I believe these were my exact words:

"Dude! Are you serious? Clearly you can see that I am over 8 months pregnant. I am not going to sit here and hammer this shut! I've waited for this paint for 45 minutes...the least you could do is close the can!" Braxton Hicks and all, I managed to storm my large pregnant self out of there. The nerve...hehe!

Back off, Paint Man!


danielle said...

Dude. We are home-improvement experts. I've seen some seriously ridiculous people at Lowes and Home Depot but NEVER that bad. If you didn't say something to the manager, you should go back and do that. And yeah, they are always supposed to put the dot on the can. (Sorry, you must have struck a pregnancy hormone with me). :-)

andiewade said...

that... is awesome. not the stupid paint man, but that you let him have it. personally, i've been really fiesty this pregnancy and i wasn't last time around. melissa cross thinks it's b/c i'm having a boy so i have all this foreign testosterone in me. it makes sense to me. and after hearing your story i think it might be a good boy theory :).

Doyle said...

I have to say, as a person who has worked a lot of retail, that's freakin' ridiculous. Usually, I admit, I find myself siding with the poor associate who gets reamed whilst trying to do their job. In that case, he wasn't even trying. That's horrible. If I were you, straight to the manager.